Reached Zheng Fa, Marina South, at appointed time. Walked 2 rounds round the entire complex to burn time while the rest of the people, held up by a small minority, were one hour late (punctuality is a virtue ladies and gentlemen). The place is amazing in making optimum use of the buffet self-cooked-food concept. Essentially it cuts on a lot of cost by being simply a place you can cook your food beside a place where you can get food. The only way they can maximise profits even more is by providing only the cutlery and the steamboat machine, and then locating themselves next to a real wet market (which unfortunately doesn't open so late).

Not only that, they season food with salt so that you have to pay a lot extra for the only thing you have to pay extra for, which is drinks. Cut cost by packing people in a non-aircon environment and providing cheap furniture.

Of course, the food is good, and that's all really matters. It's also offered in an amazingly large variety and by my standards, is rather fresh. Fresh enough that they give you live prawns which jumped out of the damn container while I was washing them. Twelve bucks is pretty damn worth it when you consider the lack of variety and high charges that other similar (albeit air-conditioned) places have.

Played one game of DotA, rather uneventful. We had Viper QoP Sandking Pugna Furion up against Chen VS THD Warlock Zeus. As you can guess, early game was kind of screwed, with Lux's QoP getting perseverance with a ratio of 2-7 while my Viper got a reaver (though the reaver wasn't too slow). Post-reaver, the tide starts to turn. A few good engagements results in everyone KSing the Viper and getting rich. Things take a turn for the best for my team, excluding me. Deciding to give the QoP leeway to farm (even though she KSed everything I had, and I mean KS as in they would have died without wave anyway but wave was saved, though I guess it's the only way the QoP can come back and farm well after a really bad start), I proceed to move to another lane. As Murphy's law goes, Pugna decides to come and ruin my farming, so I head to the only lane that isn't being farmed, and QoP decides that the lane she was at was a little dangerous and proceeds to steal the lane from me. I head back to the bottom lane, waiting patiently for creeps to push forward so I can farm safely. As the creeps finally allow me to safely farm, I manage to get one wave down before Wrath of Nature effectively screws my farming over. Again. Whoo.

I guess Viper played by Ant is meant to be a supporter not a farmer eh?

Furion and QoP proceed to go on a KSing spree. QoP because the QoP wants to farm, so that's fine, and Furion because Wrath of Nature just comes in at that perfect moment to finish the target I'm picking off, so I guess that's unpredictable. The only hero that doesn't KS Ant's support Viper is the Sandking because he's probably lagging badly.

Even Shan decides to KS me.

KS my creeps and KS my heroes, fine, but don't KS my neutrals. But damn, Furion has been neutral creeping all the way and there are none of which to kill! Relic only goes up by virtue of my low number of deaths. A failed push in mid game (and a lot of very badly timed Infernals), as you can see from the draft, meant that the game was essentially won. At around 50 minutes, we push because Lux needs to sleep. Winning comes quickly.

Musica requested that I watch a replay because he feels the game was very good. I head off for Zheng Fa, where Lux and Cloud proceed to convince me that perhaps this replay is actually worth watching. So I watch it.

I don't usually comment about games that I'm not part of or didn't witness first-hand, the emotion and the intensity is replaced with objectivity and every other boring thing that makes the commenting rather dull. Nevertheless, by request of Musica, here's a not very good battle report. Real battle reports take about 1 week to finish with pretty pictures and whatsnot. I'm not even going to describe what happens unless it's major. Heck, it won't even be a battlereport, just a highlight so when you have lots of time to burn you might politely ask for the replay from him and be politely ignored because he is AFK.

I'll be writing as I watch, so this report will proceed in a rather boring linear fashion. Anyway, if you've read until this point, no harm reading till the end...

The game starts with Musica's team having Warlock, QoP, Chen, THD, VS up against Warlock, Viper, Zeus, Sandking, and Enchantress. Now, remember guys, that when Enchantress becomes first pick, that I THOUGHT OF IT!! MINE!! MINE!! Three minutes into the game, things aren't looking good for them. Whereas Lux's destroyer seems to be doing well against Warlock in mid, our dear Chen from CaoCao at btm has a total of 0 experience points and 0 creeps, and Musica in his usual blowing fashion is level 1 at top lane even when soloing.

In yet another horrible moment, the Chen, VS, and THD proceed to wail on the Zeus at the bottom lane. With six heads focused on bringing down the Zeus (Chen, Chen's wolf, VS, VS' projectile, THD Head 1 and THD Head 2), an unruly senile suicidal druid decides to steal the kill. This naughty druid is ceremoniously KILLED by the Vengeful Spirit because well, she's vengeful.

Speaking of which, Vengeful Spirit is not only vengeful (hate is bad! Sin #1), but also a slut (well I'm not sure which sin this comes under, but it falls under something, Sin #2!). I mean, what kind of hero literally THROWS HERSELF AT THE OPPONENT?

Hur hur hur.

Which hero wins, Chen or Zeus?

Chen, because Chen owns the Zoos.

Hur hur hur.

But I digress.

Which hero sucks?

LEECH!

HUR HUR HUR!!

Perhaps I should just focus on the more important events. Afterall, reporting each individual moment means this could turn out to be as long a the previous fifty or so posts COMBINED.

Self-written Eulogy of Harbinger the Obsidian Destroyer (complete with cheesy pseudo-rhyming couplets). Remember kids, only in DotA can you write your own eulogy!:
A Warlock to farm, here at mid lane!
Halp! I'm being pwned by Shadow Word Pain!
Looking to the sky, I start to groan
The Warlock drops his !@#!ing stone
While Chen stands still and watches me die
And Musica's QoP whines about why
He can't farm top (oh what a noob)
So like any good teammate should
I go to top - A viper to pwn!
Thinks I as a spear to me is thrown
When the @#$!ing Dryad sneaks from the back
To launch a @#$!ing sneak attack
curse all her tactics of stealth
I've only farmed a Ring of Health
I go to mid cause the Queen of Pain
Can't farm, oh! She drives me insane!
But no sooner do I arrive at mid lane
that I feel the need to be very profane
As viper starts to approach me
And I quickly start to TP
But an Infernal lands, HOLY SHIT
THERE ARE FOUR HEROES GANKING ME AT MID
Without getting one creep, I die again
but at least bottom lane's empty for the Queen of Pain
And just as I buy myself a PB
the sandking burrowstrike-epis me
and the Warlock drops his !@#!ing stone
as my teammates let me die alone
Barely twenty minutes into the game
I have four deaths oh what a shame!

Actually they aren't getting pwned that badly. In fact, things are rather even. Viper has his relic at the half hour mark, courtesy of Musica being pwned at top lane, but Musica has got a PB and Ult orb from his free farming at btm, and Lux does have 2.3k, even with a 0-4 record. Things are looking rather even. As a matter of fact, Lux is the highest level in the team despite having no kills and having been taken down a lot. Even Musica who has soloed and freefarmed for most of the game is lower level, and Maki's VS, with a ratio of 7-1, has been moving around a lot so can't be of too high level. Only the opponent's Viper and Warlock higher level than Lux.

43 minutes into the game though, both teams seem quite even. Musica gets his Skadi from the many minutes of free farming, and Lux has his Agahnim. Viper meanwhile has 3.9k, a reaver, a relic, and a vita booster (can you say WOW! THAT'S A LOT!) and the Enchantress, in a bold but ultimately STUPID attempt IMO to invent her own build, has a soul booster. As of now, I HAVE NO DAMN IDEA WHY MUSICA WANTS ME TO WATCH THIS REPLAY. Then again, one thing worth watching though, is Maki's VS. He's 8-1 with a rather early BKB (by the standards of VS) and just did a very good swap to save Lux's life.

49 minutes into the game, Viper completes a BKB and a Heart (leaving the relic unconverted into a big item) and the scourge (meaning the team that DOESN'T have Lux, Maki, and other feeders in it) start to push mid lane. The 2nd tower goes down without any resistance and it seems that because Musica, in a Tofu-like moment, DOESN'T WANT TO WAVE, the base tower in the mid lane will go down without any resistance as well.

In a bold moment, taking initiative as a member of the alliance of flying things, the obsidian destroyer TPs to the base tower. No sooner does he do so that he realises that perhaps the other members of the alliance of flying things aren't as intelligent as he, and not only because Agahnim's Sceptre adds 25 intelligence.

It's rather ironic that while the SR-71 Blackbird fighter was designed to slip alone into enemy territory, this Black Bird can't make his entrance any more obvious because he happens to be ALONE, UNASSISTED BY ANY TEAMMATES, SURROUNDED BY FIVE ENEMIES.

A green bird that unfortunately didn't join the alliance of flying things proceeds to launch a green dagger of Viper Strike at him. The warlock also drops another #$!$ing green stone at him. This would probably make a very nice picturesque moment, a green bird and a green Infernal landed from a green Warlock launching green things at him in the green of the sentinel base with the forces of the Scourge forces around (which are ironically, of the green colour). Yes, a very picturesque moment this would be if not for the fact that the black bird is in a !#$!ING LOAD OF PAIN.

As if that's not enough, Lux proceeds to transform into GREEN LANTERN (I don't actually know what the hell this Superhero does but I know he exists) as he becomes invulnerable to all sorts of damage in his Astral Prison. Now the league of extraordinary flying things proceed to help out this green superhero blackbird (wait, green and black? What?).

No wait, spooky-old-flying-thing (some might know him as THD) happens to be healing in base. So much for the alliance of flying things helping each other out eh?

Lux, alone, awaiting his death, proceeds to try to cast his ultimate.

Did you know that the Obsidian Destroyer has the longest casting animation in the game?

Did you also know that Lightning Bolt interrupts spell-casting and animations? Well, I think you knew this one.

So as he tries to cast his ultimate, Zeus lightning bolts him (a lightning bolt hitting a black bird? What a poetic match-up) and as a rogue member of the alliance of flying things, Viper takes the black bird down.

One day I could write a nice story about the alliance of flying things in DotA and whatsnot... but I digress.

Oh, and spooky-old-flying-thing is still healing in base, not realising about the loss of his dear teammate black-intelligent-flying-thing, because black-intelligent-flying-thing, with his study of the black arts, has managed to buy himself out of the graveyard!

Who says money can't buy you everything eh?

Meanwhile, as the Obsidian Destroyer charges towards the tower, Chen, VS, and QoP are busy getting their asses handed to them. Dealing almost no damage whatsoever, VS is forced to TP back to the fountain, QoP is reduced to red health, and Sandking epicentres the Chen, but not before the enchantress steals the one and only centaur from him. A stun from the newly-stolen centaur and a few spears from the enchantress leave the obsidian destroyer also with red health.

As all the members of the sentinel run away from their tower doing almost no damage at all, Viper, not yet quite satisfying his bloodlust to take down the members of the alliance of flying things, proceeds to chase down Spooky-old-flying-thing. Spooky-old-flying-thing rants about how these spoilt young kids will be the death of him, since, well, they DID kill him.

No, I'm serious.

Cloud (i.e. spooky-old-flying-thing or THD): The viper is zzz...
Cloud: rich lorh.

YES. THOSE DAMN SPOILT RICH KIDS. THEY'LL BE THE DEATH OF ME!! RAWR I AM SENILE OLD MAN!!

Meanwhile, the Warlock with his eye of skadi proceeds to hunt down the Obsidian Destroyer, and with the Enchantress hurling spears of +150 damage, the Obsidian Destroyer dies very damn quickly. Without having a chance to use his ultimate.

Oh, did I mention that while all this was happening, the middle base ancient protector got destroyed?

Heh, did you really think that when those heroes pledged their life to the sentinel, they would die to save you? Not a chance, fat ancient protector. Meh. Even with you being ancient and all. These young punks only think for themselves. Meh.

Choosing this moment to appear, Batwoman (ala Queen of Pain) blinks out of the fountain and in a very womanly whine (aha! A little alliteration!), unleashes a sonic wave which hits a grand total of TWO heroes. Gee, could have waved earlier don't you think?

Well, unfortunately the scourge is stupid enough to go closer to Batwoman to give her the opportunity to unleash yet another womanly whine with a scream of pain. The heroic Vengeful Spirit lends a hand. With the constant damage the two ancient protectors by the World Tree was doing to the heroes of the scourge, and the whining of the Queen of Pain, the scourge has to back off, leaving both ancients in Mid Lane still intact.

If they had just whacked those damn ancients and not chase down the heroes and take all that damage from the 2 ancient protectors, they probably would have gotten one lane down and taken no casualties, but heck.

At 52 minutes, Maki the Vengeful Spirit, in all his wiseness, reports to the village of the Sentinel that there is a push incoming, and that they should make early preparations, in light of how the great Ancient Protector in the middle lane has fallen. The wise elders, Chen and Spooky-Old-Flying-Thing, heed his words, and make preparations for defense. Black-intelligent-flying thing, with abundance of health, teleports home.

The young punk Batwoman though, is busy farming the bottom lane with half health and no sign of teleporting.

In a sacrificial attempt to delay the enemy, the Vengeful Spirit swaps the Sandking into the base, for him to be wailed on by the THD and for the THD to use macropyre on all of one enemy hero, who promptly blinks away. Nevertheless, this sacrifice touches the hearts of the young punk Batwoman, and in a heroic change of mind, the young batwoman Teleports home, ready to give her life for the ancients.

Maki the wise manages to survive, but it is too late for Old-Spooky-Flying-Thing. Defying all logic, spikes from the ground proceed to stun the FLYING dragon, and he gets taken down quickly. The Sandking then surrounds himself with a barrier of sand, barely escaping the womanly whine of Batwoman, but the ultimate of the Obsidian Destroyer takes him down.

Which unfortunately, leaves Mister Obsidian Destroyer as a very damn obvious target for Enchantress, Viper, and Warlock, who take him down in about 2 seconds. The heroes of the scourge, wiser this time, wail on the two ancients in the middle lane.

The Vengeful Spirit, in a valiant attempt to save the trees, teleports into the midst of the enemy, and gives her life away for the ancients. It's not amazing that the Vengeful Spirit is vengeful seeing as how she's letting herself die to everyone.

The Queen of Pain, in a not as valiant attempt to save herself, blinks away from the battlefield, completely unwilling to sacrifice herself for the ancients. Selfish young punks these days... oh, and whiny too.

And so the two ancients in the middle lane fall, and the scourge promptly retreat.

At 56 minutes, in yet another Tofu-like moment, Musica gets caught by Viper, Sandking, and Enchantress. Like any superhero in a tragic play, Batwoman revels in her own invulnerability, takes a long time to make her escape, and is promptly punished by the Gods, who finish her off with lightning from the heavens.

To make things even more tragic, the spooky old dragon, who probably had the hots for this young punk and has to fight it out with his other head over who gets her, rushes in foolishly to save Batwoman and also, well, dies. Zeus grabs himself a haste rune, and together with warlock, chase down the Vengeful Spirit, who well, suffice to say, ends up becoming even more vengeful.

And Batwoman buys herself out from the dead. The things you can do with money these days...

With one hero dead, the scourge decides to push the bottom lane. They clean out the 2nd tower in no time at all, and proceed to the tower at the base. Viper uses his avatar-on-a-stick and wails on the tower in the base. Meanwhile, Warlock and Sandking distract the enemy by launching more green things at them, with no great effect. The green flare at the end of the Sandking's tail results in the THD flying him up in a great tornado. Nevermind that giant scorpians flying around is about the creepiest thing I can think of right now.

Proving the fittingness of his name, the Obsidian Destroyer promptly destroys the Warlock's infernal in two hits. The Queen of Pain is also promoted up the ladder of the Alliance of Flying Things by riding the skies in a whirling cyclone three times in a row. Of course, this means that there is nothing stopping Viper from taking the ancient protector down, which he does.

In a moment of vengefulness, the Queen of Pain unleashes her fury on Viper as his spell immunity runs out, bringing Viper down. As the heroes of the Scourge retreat, Batwoman blinks after them.

On her second blink, she blinks right into the middle of Zeus, Warlock, and Enchantress. Is this a moment of her folly, or is she going to-

Well, scrape that. Queen of Pain dies badly.

Thinking it's safe again, Old Spooky Dragon comes out and is GANKED BY THREE HEROES. Good use of cyclone on the warlock however, keeps him alive. Vengeful Spirit then waltzes in and uses her spell-immunity-on-a-stick, proceeding to wail on the Zeus. The Scourge valiantly try to continue the push, but is driven off.

Viper suicide backdoors the 2nd top tower of the Sentinel, which like all other suicidal moves, lands him dead, without rewards. The Sentinel then proceed to catch the Enchantress, and the rest of the other heroes, with Viper having left them. Score for the Sentinel!

But well, they still are one lane down.

Never giving up, like true villians, the heroes of the scourge revive, and immediately get back to work on pushing bottom lane. Sandking's epicentre however, hits NOTHING, and a venture too deep into the Sentinel's base to do almost no damage and get hit by the two towers by the World Tree lands Sandking and Viper dead, though not before taking down the Obsidian Destroyer and reducing a large amount of the hit points of the Sentinel heroes.

Well, as unwise as the Heroes of the scourge are, it's good to know that their creeps are kind of smart, managing to take down the Ancient of War while everything was happening (with a little help from Viper pre-engagement).

To cut a long story short, Chen and QoP retreat with red HP, while the dragon dies, leaving Ench, Warlock and Zeus, the three scrooges of the scourge, to screw the bottom lane (more alliteration!).

So the Sentinels have two lanes down, are going to lose, and I see really no damn reason why I have been reporting on this replay other than to see Musica be like Tofu, feeding and farming fast. Well, he does get his Aegis up, but this game is over.

Cloud: Lose to a bunch of nerds =.=
Lux: My bad
Lux: Farm too slow

Musica: Never say die

Well, with his spanking new Aegis up, it's easy for Musica to say so, cause well, he's IMMORTAL (for as long as the charges on his Aegis last anyway). Of course, in a situation such as this, his Aegis charges are going to run out VERY QUICKLY, as you will see in due time.

Meanwhile, two very stupid pushes on the top lane by the Scourge heroes however (I mean very stupid, as in Sandking Epi's air, heroes charge into enemy fountain without doing any damage whatsoever) nets Musica a divine rapier, Maki the Vengeful Spirit buying a Stygian Desolator to satisfy his vengefulness, Cloud with a Guinsoo, Lux with 2 mystic staffs and a PB (on top of his Agahnim's), and CaoCao with well... nothing, cause he's a feeder Chen.

No really, he's a feeder Chen.

Musica: Chen defend.
Musica: He's fei wu.

It's Musica's lack of TP however, and his duty as the primary defender of the ancients, that lands the top tower of the Sentinel's base demolished.

The sentinels are now working on a timebomb. It won't be long before the Scourge just keeps rushing them and brings down their third and final set of ancients. Can they take down the Frozen Throne before supercreeps are unleashed?

Stay tuned for the answer!

Well, no, they can't.

Musica's attempt to backdoor the Mid tower sets him back one charge of Aegis with the tower still at a healthy 1000+ hit points, so hey, there goes the great chance to push back. Musica's stubborness in refusing to get BKB lands him promoted way up the ladder of the alliance of flying things by being permanently cycloned up in the air as the Warlock pushes down the towers by the World Tree, and the rest of the heroes launch all they have at the top lane ancients.

A very slow Zeus allows Musica enough time to kill the viper at the top lane before being sent to fly in the air again, but it's too late to do any lasting damage. Musica attempts to backdoor the mid lane, but doesn't even touch the tower before being driven off. He cleverly waits around though, waiting again for the Scourge to push so he has an opportunity to backdoor. He is rewarded with one less charge of Aegis as Zeus and Viper promptly catch him and bring him down after he blinks to be stuck in the trees in a failed attempt to escape (so much for Batwoman eh?).

Another slow push from the Scourge results in them being wiped at the top. However, this also results in the World Tree being left without any Ancient Protectors to defend it.

Meanwhile, another failed attempt by Musica to backdoor results in... the same thing that happened when he tried to backdoor the other two times. If you can count, that means he has no more charges of Aegis left.

Maki-: They can't kill me.
Maki-: I'm fit.
CaoCao: He feed.
Vengeful Spirit has fallen.

While acting all invulnerable as the Sentinels push again, Maki gets caught alone and dies. The scourge, acting all stupid again, decide to split up and die badly, trying to run against a team with mass slows and disablers, without even bothering to attack any structures.

At this point, 100 minutes into the game, I have no !@#!ing idea what Musica is trying to do. He ups his 2nd Aegis, and proceeds to attempt to solo Roshan.

He proceeds to attack Roshan and do about no damage for 3 minutes, before Zeus uses Wrath and spots him.

UH OH!!

A warlock promptly appears beside Musica. UH OH!!

This Warlock is also stupid because he has absolutely no backup. UH OH! Dead Warlock!

Lux joins in and does in 20 seconds what Musica has been unable to do in 3 minutes, kill Roshan.

The scourge fails yet another push because they simply have no idea that they can skip creeps while their teammates are busy occupying the rest of the Sentinel heroes halfway across the map. Cycle repeats itself. Musica tries to backdoor mid, and fails. Things are looking up though, because he DOESN'T DIE!

Viper proceeds to charge at the World Tree, bringing it down to less than 2000 HP. Repeat the cycle, Musica backdoors, doesn't kill a single damn thing, and retreats.

The Scourge gets smarter now. As Zeus and Enchantress charge at the top lane ancients, Warlock, Sandking, and Viper charge at the World Tree. Unfortunately, they decide their chances are higher if they charge in one by one and if they charge in at different times. How wrong they are.

Musica gets himself a 2nd Divine Rapier by selling off his boots. The World Tree however, is at 1000 hit points, and the ancients at the top lane are dangerously close to devastation.

Finally deciding to honour his pact to the World Tree and give his life to the ancients, Musica decides to die to take down one tower in the Scourge's base. Well, since he has an Aegis, it doesn't really count as dying, but heck, the World Tree is screwed, not Scrooge. Two hours into the game, Musica has only 1 charge of Aegis left.

Being smart finally, the Scourge get their act together.

The final push unleashes supercreeps.

With supercreeps unleashed, and the World tree at 1000 hit points, the Sentinel really are in a pinch here.

Fortunately, the supercreeps are on the side of the Sentinel.

A desperate push from the Scourge had left all of them but one dead, giving Musica the perfect opportunity to blink into the Scourge base and clear ALL of their remaining raxes.

At this moment, the Sentinel team charges into the Scourge base to take down the Frozen Throne. All but CaoCao's Chen who is left to defend the World Tree.

A final crisis awaits the Sentinels.

A crack team of 6 Ghouls and 4 Necrolytes breaks through the middle lane barrier, and launches themselves at the 1000HP World Tree. In the process, they also take down the Chen.

Yup boys, Chen has been taken down by creeps.

The tree is at 1000 hit points. Of course, the might of this crack team does not match up in the least bit to supercreeps and the Sentinel heroes.

At 126 minutes, the game ends, the World Tree has 400 hit points left.

While not worth watching a 2 hour game, I DID learn a lot from this.

1) Never give up. As Musica puts it, never say die.
2) The game is never over until it's over. Don't get cocky and screw up your crucial push.
3) Heck, even when you're not cocky, don't screw up all your many crucial pushes... you only have so many.
4) Destroyer is imba.
5) Never ever try to do a short battle report on a 2 hour long game.
6) And never ever let Musica play QoP in a serious match.

Musica: Give this replay to Ant
Musica: I wonder what he'll write

It's actually a little long, even for my liking.